The Permanent Committee to Recall the Governor was in special session in San Francisco last night, debating measures to take in response to the delay of the immediate recall election by the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals. One firebrand from Hayward attempted to agitate the committee into staging an impromptu march on the Federal Court building downtown, but a quick tally by the chairman showed that the members of the committee did not possess adequate funds to take the bus back to chambers afterwards, due to the recent 25 cent increase in Muni fares. The motion was therefore tabled, becoming yet another victim of the hard times affecting the state.
As might be expected, there were a few members who voiced strong resentment against an arm of the Federal government meddling in state affairs, and the word secession was on the lips of many. Eventually, the chairman was forced to restore order by mounting the rostrum himself and delivering an elegant speech on the need to maintain focus and discipline in the committee’s work. If the answer to the state’s plight was secession, then the committee should voluntarily disband and return to the general assembly of The Glob Political Action Wing with empty hands, but with a firm resolve to marshall forces for the greater work. Yet what was the more immediate threat to the commonweal of California? The Ninth Circuit, or the inept tyranny of the governor?
With a single voice, the committee answered with a thunderous oath impugning the governor’s probity, intelligence, and overall presentability in genteel company. The Ninth Circuit’s decision was denounced as a Fabian tactic, mere cunctation by opponents of reform. The committee proceeded to nominate six members to a subcommittee for the drafting of an amicus brief for the inevitable appeal. The committee then heard the report from the Permanent Subcommittee for Cultivating Grassroots, who asserted that despite their best efforts, the electorate remained mighty confused by the whole business.
The debate then shifted to the question of how to best educate the public as to the benefits of a regular course of elections to recall the governor. The representative from Mill Valley advocated a series of issue ads placed in the major television markets, circulating a draft script for one such piece:
SLOW PAN OF INTERIOR OF CAR’S ENGINE COMPARTMENT WITH
V/O: We all know that politics can be a dirty business.
PAN REVEALS GREASY HANDS OF MECHANIC, MAKING ADJUSTMENTS
V/O: If you stay in office long enough, it’s impossible to keep your hands clean.
CUT TO REVEAL TIME PASSAGE. A CLEANER SET OF HANDS MAKING ADJUSTMENTS WITH</br>
V/O: So why do you change your oil every six months, but wait four years to change governors?</br>
SUPER OVER SHOT OF A SLEEK LIMO WITH STATE SEAL:
“THE PERMANENT COMMITTEE TO RECALL THE GOVERNOR”
This proposal was met with loud calls of approval, until the acting treasurer rendered an estimate of the cost to produce and air such a commercial. Dismayed by the figures, the committee engaged in some half-hearted speculations about securing corporate sponsorship before voting to adjourn for the evening. The meeting over, a few of the members strolled to North Beach for refreshment, each secretly hoping to run into a celebrity who might be converted to the cause.